Senior dating, where do you begin is a good question and one I hear often from my clients looking to get back out there. Dating has changed so much since most of us seniors were even thinking about it, let alone having to start all over again. Personally for me, I was 50 when I got remarried and to be honest, I wasn’t looking to date or get married at the time. Actually, I had just told my friend I was tired of the dating thing and would probably just get a puppy to keep me company.
It can really be hard to even know where to begin, especially if you were married for many years or in a long term relationship. Divorce, passing of a spouse or life-long partner, whatever the reason, it doesn’t get easier. It’s especially hard if you were in an abusive marriage or relationship, or your partner cheated. It takes a lot for you to trust again. It’s not any easier if you were in a loving marriage or relationship and your partner passed away. I’ve heard many widows and widowers say they feel like they would be cheating if they were to get into dating or even remarried. Your friends and family keep telling you to get back out there but they have no idea you don’t even know how or where to begin.
Earlier this month, the popular dating app Tinder had an epic, thirty post Twitter meltdown in response to a critical Vanity Fair article decrying today’s millennial “hook-up” culture (and apps like Tinder) as responsible for a kind of dating apocalypse.
Those critical of online and mobile dating technology contend that easily accessible sex has replaced human relating and posed a daunting barrier to finding love. They say that with so many opportunities for easily obtainable hook-ups or sex, men (and women) have little impetus or time to seek out serious relationships. Others say that online dating is just not a place where a serious, soulful relationship can be found.
It’s true that online dating can be a pool fraught with creeps and guys who send crude two word questions, and just about everyone knows a funny (or horrible) online dating story. One of the most popular refrains I hear from app weary clients is, “I’m just so over online dating. There’s no good guys!” But does this mean that it’s impossible to find a partner online?