Articles

How to Spot a Romantic Intensity Addiction

Imagine a summer romance novel; a delicious story of romance and intrigue wherein our hero or heroine meets a potential partner so daring, dangerous, distant or complicated that their heart-breaking, intense and destructive pairing is the most fascinating and fun read ever.

But imagine if our heroine met  a broker with a stable job, a dog and a nice house, and they lived happily ever after instead? BORING!

Even though we live in a culture that pursues balance, prosperity and happiness, there’s a part of all of us that appreciates the dark, passionate, difficult entanglement of drama and intensity.

While passion and deep emotions are a natural part of our human nature and lend to the beauty of our lives, intensity and drama can also be addictive and, in extreme cases, this addiction can destroy relationships and lives.

Everyone likes intensity sometimes, but the relationship intensity-addict seeks out constant sources of excitement, seduction, and the giddy “highs” of sexual or emotional attraction but is never fulfilled or sated by these highs, so they seek them out over and over again in increasingly risky or limiting scenarios. They often see themselves simply  as poetic and hopeless romantics until they hit the same walls over and over.