Finding a Soul Mate

soul mate

Have you found your soul mate yet? Are you still looking for your soul mate? Where the heck do you find your soul mate? What is the definition of a soul mate? Are these the type of questions you are always asking yourself?

I do psychic readings and if I had a dime for every time someone came to me asking about their soul mate, I could buy my own island.

I have to wonder if most of these people even have an idea of what a soul mate is so I looked up the definition in Webster’s Dictionary.

It says: 1. A person who is perfectly suited to another in temperament. 2. A person who strongly resembles another person in attitudes and beliefs.

My take is someone that is pretty much just like me. Someone with the same temperament, attitudes and beliefs. Does that mean someone who acts, thinks and behaves just like me? Is there really only one person out there in the whole world that would fit this description and would I really want to spend every day of my life with essentially a clone of me.

Sounds rather boring and not very interesting if we always agreed on everything. Where would the excitement come in? Does this mean we would always feel and think the same about everything? I, personally, wouldn’t want my spouse, lover or whatever position they hold, to have the same emotions and thoughts I have, besides I have some crazy thoughts depending on where I am that day.

I so often hear clients say they need a soul mate to complete them. Seriously, if you aren’t happy with yourself, you can’t make someone else happy. We create our own happiness, we shouldn’t look to others to make us happy. That would be a hard job, I would never saddle someone else with that task. Complete you, really, isn’t that a catch phrase from a movie and sort of unpractical in real life. What can you add to a relationship, rather friendship, family or romantic if you are not good in your own skin?

Sadly I see so many people searching so hard for that one person, that perfect mate, the one that will be their soul mate, they tend to overlook the obvious. They don’t see the person that is always there for them, in good times and bad. The one you can always count on to give you a reality check when they think you are about to make a bad choice, even if it causes a disagreement. Someone with flaws and baggage of their own, but still makes time to listen. You feel comfortable enough with them to allow them to see you in an old pair of sweats, no make-up on a bad hair day.

You can share secrets, laugh at your mistakes (which they usually point out to you) and have heated debates on everything from politics to religion. Sometimes you are polar opposites on topics, but allow each other to make their point and don’t judge even when you think they are wrong.

Most people I have come across think a soul mate is the perfect person. Truly, we are all flawed humans, there is no perfect person anywhere on this earth. They seem to think a soul mate will make their life perfect. The reality is, if your life is totally screwed up, you are the one that needs to fix it, not put that burden on another person. Will you live happily ever after once you find your soul mate? You do know that only happens in fairy tales, not in the real world.

Wouldn’t you be better off with that person that will go through life’s ups and downs, joys and sorrow but still be there for you? A good fit for me is the person that has their own flaws and can overlook mine. I’m not perfect, so having do deal everyday with someone that is would be just too taxing. It would take away from me, the person I am, to have to try to be on my best behavior all the time.

To always think, feel and believe the same as someone else would take away my spirit, the inner workings of me, the thing that makes me the unique person I know. I would rather have someone that has their own belief, their own thoughts and their own unique personality.

Well, that’s my take on the subject of soul mates. Does it agree with yours, maybe not, but that’s okay. I’m always open to hearing others view points on the subject, so comment or contact me, I’d love to hear your ideas.

With that said, I’m off to work giving readings and dollars to donuts I will get at least three or four clients today asking when they will meet their soul mate.


This article also appears on my website.

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